Ugh...so I had to do a really hard thing today.
Okay - I'll admit that in the scheme of things ("things" being the world), it really WASN'T that hard. But, it was still pretty difficult to me.
Today, I had to cut my last ties with someone I've been friends with for over 10 years.
Now, to sort of sum up the reasons for this I have to give a little background. My friend has been dating a guy off and on for a few years now. At one point he broke up with her, started dating her roommate behind her back, then broke up with that girl a few months later and asked my friend to come back. My friend did...but also broke the heart of my very best guy friend in the process. Not cool. So anyway, not long after they moved from Georgia to Mississippi so that he could resume tattooing at another shop (instead of owning his own). He's been telling her they are getting married, but it never happened. Then, at the beginning of the summer...they had a huge argument (involving alcohol of course) and he told her to get out. Even though her name is on the house just as much as his. So, get out she did. She went to live back in Georgia with a friend of ours (aforementioned roommate/ex-girlfriend of her man) and after a few weeks, this dude (we'll call him J) starts begging her to come back. Again. When the week before, he had actually told her he didn't miss her at all. He tells her that if she comes back, they can go to vegas and get married as soon as possible. So she goes.
Now...through all of this I have tried to be pretty supportive. I offered the advice that I could, was a shoulder for her to lean on when she was upset..and told her that she was worth way more than she (or he) was giving her credit for. When she went back to him, I told her I didn't think it was a good idea but that I would support her anyway.
So..a few weeks ago when I went back to Georgia, our mutual friend decided to throw her a bachelorette party. She even went to Mississippi to pick the girl up so she wouldn't have to spend any gas money or anything (since they were saving for Vegas). So..party was had...it was a lot of fun and everything. But after everyone left, J started texting my friend..talking about how it wasn't fair that she got to go have fun while he had to stay and work. It's not HER fault his friends didn't throw him a bachelor party - or at leas that's what we thought. But anywya...she was drunk and irritated so she turned her phone off...causing him to freak.out. In the end...he ended up driving to Georgia (and spending their money) to come pick her up...which caused her to not be able to spend her birthday with her family or doing any of the things we had planned (that was the night we went to Nero). She spent her birthday in a care. With him screaming at her. AFter he drove to Georgia and screamed at the girl who THREW HER THE PARTY...slammed every door in her house..and threw my friends clothes and stuff everywhere. Yeah...anger problem much?
Anyway...we got pretty worried because she did leave with him and she wouldn't answer our calls or anything. She eventually texted both of us and said "I'm okay and we are home." but that was pretty much it. So, a few days pass...I get back to the Mizz and B (her old roommate) calls and says that J made my friend call her and basically say that she couldn't talk to any of us for 9 months because "that's how long it will take to prove her love for him.."
SERIOUSlY?!?!?!
So...after all of that...we were pretty much devastated that our friendship meant so little to her that she couldn't even stand up to this psycho who verbally and mentally abuses her. especially since we have been best friends for over 10 years. It just..it really got to me and I was pretty upset about it for a few days. Wanna know the worst part? She didn't even call me to tell me any of this...she let B do it for her. The only contact I've had with her since I got back to Mizz is when she sent me a picture of her in her wedding dress. Because apparently..that's what I want to see. lol.
Anyway..I just realized today that if I can be so disposable to someone..well..i'm just better than that. So in 9 months, when she decides she wants to be my friend again...I won't be here. And when their marriage fails like I think it will inevitably will because this guy is a crazy person...I will feel bad for her. But she's already burnt that bridge...I can't go back across it now.
I hate to be that way about it...but I put myself out there a lot for friends. And I do it over and over and over again..only to continue getting hurt each time. So..why put myself through that anymore? If you don't want to be my friend, quit frontin'. I don't give two shits - I've got plenty of other people to lean on who actually care about whether I'm around or not. Good.bye.
Sorry that was all so long and drawn out. I just had to get it out there before I just completely burst. Ugh.
Had A&P Lab tonight...these lectures are a little hard to keep up with right now because it's a lot of new information, but he keeps telling us that soon it will all start coming together in a more organized manner. I sure hope so. My notebook is getting a little too chaotic for my taste..lol. Eek.
Tomorrow is Nutrition class, so we shall see how that goes I suppose. Apparently we are supposed to be dissecting cats in our A&P lab too cause he keeps referring to it. Not that I really care...I just haven't dissected anything since like AP Biology in high school. lol. So that should be interesting, to say the least.
Anyway..I'm out. I've gotta get up early to start getting signs and baskets ready for the redeployment next week...I'll be glad when all of this is over.
John's Hillbilly Birthday Party this weekend. Yay!
